Taking the Dream for What It Is

When I first started this journey, the decision to change, to become what I truly am, was of the utmost importance.  There was an intense sense of urgency.  After all, I could no longer live my life as a lie.  The very thought of that was so abhorrent to me that I wanted to leap off a building rather than live one more second as a bundle of half-formed and ludicrous beliefs.  It was very necessary to see the life that I had led up to that point... the life of unworthiness and suffering with unconsciously held expectations of my own deserved punishment.